Posts tagged: mom
So my mom and the Stepfather got divorced recently and well, I’m not upset about it. I had been having a hard time with him and I’m not sad that he’s gone. I don’t know if this is wrong of me as they had been married for about 15 years since I was almost 4 years old. I mean, he is a good man and all, but he’s cruel. And he had some extremely hard mood swings that left the rest of us spinning. And just like my mom, I was tired of walking on eggshells around him, wary of him being set off by some silly little thing. I was tired of being stuck in the house all of the time because he never wanted to go anywhere or do anything. I was tired of it. And he had began making me feel uncomfortable. I won’t say how, but he did. So yeah, I’m glad that he’s gone. My mom doesn’t have to be miserable anymore and I don’t have to feel like a prisoner in my own home. I don’t think that makes me a bad person, do you?
I haven’t ACTUALLY been on hiatus. I’ve just been in the Twilight Zone. Seriously. I wake up, same time every morning after pressing the snooze button a precise number of times spaced evenly every five minutes, run around like a chicken with it’s head cut off trying to dress and groom and get downstairs, nearly missing the bus, same time getting to work, go scan my finger because my school is like a prison, get harassed by one of the matrons to go to my class as I am clearly heading in that direction, say good morning, open the curtains, make them eat, line them up, take them outside, listen to the Boss Lady speak incorrect English for all of the school to hear, walk the children back to class. Only variation is the number of sessions and when they are per day. Everything exactly the same. Wait for the laaate as hell bus at 3:30, may or may not leave before 4, get home, do chores, write daily report, cook, eat, pass out. Repeat. That is my life. However, this post was not supposed to be about that. I am a poet. I write poetry. Talking about my world and how I feel about it. I got my talent and love of writing from my mother. I began by writing songs, as most young people who write poetry start these days. A friend of mine from the past was stealing songs from singers and telling me that these were her own writings. Gullible, naive, 14 year old me believed her because I had never listened to music then. My best friend at the time told me that it sounded like a song that she had heard, so I googled it all and find that, yes, she was stealing. Anyways, all the songs I wrote were my own. I share everything with my mother and so I was sharing them with her. Most of them were very depressed and sad because I was still mourning the non-presence of my father. So, my mother wrote me a poem. In reply to all of the ones I had ever written before it. I will be posting it in a new post in dedication to my mommy who I love so so much.